"Register here for Trash Talk, Pickleball, and Qigong: A Revealing Edition of Coochie Island Stories!"

Trash Talk: Drama Unveiled! Coochie Sings, Bureaucratic Fares, RFDS Chest, Pickleball, Qigong, Paddlers, TRUTH, and MORE! 🌟

Bureaucracy, Bin Chickens & Button Pressing

If there’s one thing this past week has confirmed, it’s that modern life increasingly involves standing in front of systems designed specifically to prevent actual humans from helping you.

Not intentionally, of course. That would be inefficient.

But somewhere between online forms, automated responses, policy interpretations, ticket numbers, app updates, ferry compliance changes, and the occasional mysteriously disappearing rubbish bin, I suspect many of us have spent at least part of this week staring into the middle distance wondering whether we accidentally enrolled in a live-action escape room called “Administrative Processing.”

At one point this week, I found myself explaining a situation to my AI assistant because the humans involved appeared contractually unable to deviate from Script Paragraph 4B.

The AI was surprisingly empathetic, which honestly felt slightly threatening.

And look, to be fair, systems exist for reasons.

Standardisation helps things scale.

Sensible rules keep people safe.

Processes create consistency.

But there’s a strange moment that happens when systems become so streamlined that nobody inside them seems empowered to actually solve a problem anymore.

That’s when communities start feeling less like communities and more like waiting rooms.

The thing is, island communities especially have always functioned slightly differently. We survive on flexibility, relationships, common sense, and the occasional “hang on mate, let’s figure this out.” That human layer matters more than most bureaucratic frameworks seem to account for.

Of course, some weeks seem determined to test everyone’s patience all at once.

One minute you’re trying to understand transport rules. The next you’re deciphering council language that somehow uses 400 words to avoid answering a yes-or-no question.

Then an app update moves the button you’ve used for five years and suddenly you feel 97 years old yelling at technology while muttering things about “the good old days.”

Which brings me to a couple of survival tips for navigating Bureaucratic Season

1. Assume the frontline human is probably trapped in the same maze you are

Most customer service people aren’t making the rules. They’re just standing closest to the flaming wreckage. Kindness goes a surprisingly long way, especially when someone has dealt with seventeen angry people before morning tea.

That said… being polite does not mean giving up. Persistence is often the only language bureaucracy truly understands.

2. Screenshot everything

Emails. Forms. Booking numbers. Policies. Times. Dates. Carrier pigeon receipts.

Because the phrase:
“We have no record of that”
has shortened more lifespans than saturated fat.

3. Ask the “small” question nobody else asks

Sometimes the breakthrough comes from asking something simple like:
“Who is actually responsible for this?”
or
“Can you explain what that means in normal human language?”

You’d be amazed how often the room goes quiet after that.

Still, despite all the eye-rolling moments this week, there’s something reassuring about how communities respond when systems become frustrating. People share information. They help each other. They explain processes. They transport groceries. They volunteer. They check in. They joke about it together before they collectively lose the plot.

That part still works beautifully.

And perhaps that’s the real reminder underneath all the bureaucratic noise:
technology may scale systems… but humans scale resilience.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to update a password that apparently no longer meets the security requirements despite containing uppercase letters, symbols, numerals, ancient runes and what I’m fairly certain was part of a Viking oath.

Here's to fair winds and smooth sailing!

Adaire ⚓

Adaire Palmer

Editor, Coochie Community Online

What's inside this edition...

⚓ Bins for VP. Not for Coochie???

⚓ Coochie Sings. Last chance to join us for the weekend Chorale Workshop - get your tix now!

⚓ Behind the Redlands. Meet Lulu and find out what it's all about.

⚓ A parody of the silly bin removals - to lighten what can feel like an overly bureaucratic moment!

⚓ My own story about the failure of the bureaucratic transport system

⚓⚓scroll down to the end for updated and standing events and other handy information (like community contact info and how to make a complaint to council - because why not!)

"Trash Talk: The Dramatic Sequel to the Bin Saga Unveiled!"

Redland City Council has announced the return of a 240-litre enclosed bin at the Victoria Point Jetty, after significant community feedback and evidence of overflowing rubbish.

Collections will resume four times a week, signaling progress for the mainland community.

However, frustration lingers on Coochiemudlo Island, where locals stress that rubbish problems haven’t vanished just because bins remain absent at the jetty.

Takeaway cups, food wrappers, and tourist crowds continue to challenge public spaces—prompting calls for a practical, locally managed waste solution.

While servicing the mainland is easier, islanders urge Council to explore options such as partnering with volunteer groups or adjusting staff routes to provide bin services for Coochie.

The saga highlights the community’s pride in their environment and a unified desire for sensible, sustainable waste management that reflects island realities.

There’s a special kind of magic that happens when everyday people join their voices in song.

Not the sort you’d find on reality TV, but the kind that makes you grin at strangers and feel unexpectedly moved by shared harmonies.

This spirit is coming to Coochiemudlo Island at the much-anticipated Coochie Sings Chorale Workshop, led by the dynamic Mundy-Turner duo.

You don’t need to be a star — all that’s required is a willingness to connect.

These workshops go beyond music, building real community as barriers fall and laughter fills the hall.

Science even says singing together boosts happiness and wellbeing.

Locals and visitors alike will gather at the Community Hall, Victoria Parade South from May 29–30 for uplifting music and togetherness.

No experience necessary — just come ready to join in and feel the joy of Coochie singing as one.

Coochie Sings: The Feel-Good Event You Didn’t Know You Needed 🎶

Behind the Redland: Getting Curious About What's Under The Hood

Behind the Redlands is a new community initiative launched by local resident Lulu to bridge the growing disconnect between residents and Redland City Council.

Rather than serving as another online complaint forum, Lulu’s platform seeks to actively investigate council decisions, shedding light on how and why they’re made.

Monthly features focus on pressing issues—from dog parks and transport concerns to infrastructure, policy changes, and community safety—giving residents clarity on council processes and the factors that influence them.

Lulu doesn’t position the council as an adversary, but believes in building a stronger partnership between officials and locals.

Behind the Redlands aims to transform isolated frustrations into a more organised, collective community voice, encouraging accountability, transparency, and genuine consultation.

This fresh platform may be just what the Redlands needs to empower residents—and inspire real change.

A Kafkaesque moment on the jetty

What happens when a council decides the best way to manage litter is to completely destroy the rubbish bins? > Inspired by the Redland City Council’s new jetty sign, I wrote a short, Kafkaesque parody about a man, an eight-minute ferry ride, and a sticky meat pie wrapper he can never, ever get rid of. It’s a hilarious (and terrifyingly almost accurate) look at modern bureaucratic logic.

Coochie’s transition into the TransLink era is proving to be a masterclass in modern bureaucracy. After a transport card with $80 credit suddenly died at the ferry terminal, nobody locally, not Amity Trader, compliance officers, or the helpline, could actually fix the problem. Residents are now navigating a growing maze of new rules around dogs, trolleys, fuel and compliance enforcement, while practical local support seems increasingly absent. The article isn’t really about a broken card, it’s about the frustration of systems so process-driven that nobody standing in front of you has the authority to solve anything. Also: apparently Franz Kafka would’ve loved public transport.

This newsletter sponsored by

Sponsor Spot - Your Business Belongs Here!

Come to where the people are! Over 500 Subscribers and some pretty decent reach (on the Coochie Community Online Facebook Page! 👇👇👇

📬 Got an idea, event, or organisation you’d like featured? Hit reply to this email, or send a message in a bottle (aka Facebook Messenger) or to editor@coochiecommunityonline.com.

If you're looking to make a complaint to council, head to the bottom of this newsletter. You'll also find other info that might be useful.

Together, we’ll build a community resource that every Coochiemudlian (and our ML neighbours) will be glad to have in their inbox.

Events on Coochie you will want to attend...
New Events Monthly!!

Book your tickets here 🎫

Questions? Contact Rosemary: 0403 014 396

Standing items

Your portal for information about Coochie

RFDS Medical Chest on Coochie💊

💚Community on Coochiemudlo Island💚

🌴Stay Connected on Coochie 🌴

Life on Coochiemudlo Island is all about community. Whether you’re here full-time, part-time, or visiting, it’s easy to get involved and feel at home.

From emergency services and medical contacts to local clubs, sports, and social groups, there are plenty of ways to connect.

Looking for a Justice of the Peace? Want to join the Progress Association, Men’s Shed, or Recreation Club? Keen to play tennis, pickleball, or keep fit at the gym (once it reopens) Or maybe you’d like to explore art, craft, music, or gardening with fellow islanders?

You’ll find it all in one handy place.

👉 Check out the full list of community contacts here

It’s your go-to resource for staying safe, connected, and part of our wonderful island life.

📅Community Calendar📅

Want to know what's coming up? You don't need to wait for us to share, check the calendar right here!

Credit: Angela Hoskins for this wonderful resource 🥰


Your Local Library Open Saturdays 8.30 - 11.30am (Downstairs)

Read about Mabels life through books

Artisan Alley

Open Sundays from 8am (weather permitting)

Pickleball on Coochie 🥒🎾

The Fun, social exercise of pickleball continues each week on Coochie. Thurs, Fri & Sun at 4pm. All standards welcome, so come & check this out. Pickleball is moving it start times to 3pm in March and 2pm in June for the public sessions on Thurs, Fri & Sun

New players always welcome so come & join us for some fun exercise. Tuesday Youth Pickleball for 10 to 15s, continues 4.45 to 6pm.

The courts are behind the Gym & Op Shop, beside the Croquet lawn. 🥒🥎🎾😄

Want to join the fun or at least come watch the chaos?
Give Dave a buzz on 0408 079 098. He’s the Pickleball oracle around here.

Qigong on Coochie - Morwong Beach

Qigong at Morwong ( opposite 186 Victoria parade North ) in the park on Wednesdays at 8 am. All welcome and bring water. FREE!

Coochie Paddlers - room with a view

Sunrise, Salt Air and a Whole Lot of Smiles

If you’ve ever stood on the shoreline at dawn and thought, “I should be doing something with this view,” here’s your sign.

The local outrigger paddlers meet every Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 6.15am for a 6.30am start, and it’s one of the best-kept secrets for starting your day right. It’s free, it’s welcoming, and no, you don’t need to be an elite athlete who drinks kale smoothies for breakfast.

Paddling an outrigger canoe builds full-body strength without punishing your joints. You’ll work your core, shoulders and legs while getting a solid cardio workout, all without staring at a gym wall. It’s fitness disguised as fun. The kind where you’re too busy laughing to notice you’re actually working hard.

But here’s the real magic. It’s the camaraderie. There’s something about being on the water at sunrise, paddling in rhythm, that bonds people quickly. It’s friendly, frolicking, fitness-inducing and genuinely good for the soul. You’ll leave energised, salty-haired and slightly smug that you’ve already conquered the day before most people have had their first coffee.

If you’d like to give it a go, contact Helen on 0414 533 781 and she’ll point you in the right direction.

Early mornings never looked so good. 🌊🚣‍♀️

Image taken by Adaire (that's me!) from the outrigger canoe recently. HDIGABTT?!?!?!

Standing for TRUTH and FREEDOM

Every First Sunday Of Each Month From 10-11am

1000+ parks. Over 30 Countries.

No Agenda
No Religion
No Leaders

Wear yellow in unity.

Coochie's Stand In The Park is in the park at Main Beach, in the shelter opposite the Memorial (near the beach bar)

🙏Alpha at Pineridge Place 6pm Tuesdays 🙏

Red Bin, Yellow Bin, or Both?

Below is the yellow bin calendar for the rest of the year.

You can either look down the road and follow your neighbours lead, or check in here and take the lead your neighbours will follow 🤣

CSA RE: Coochie Island Progress Association

It appears the CIPA Facebook Page has been sucked into that black hole of cyber-space. CIPA have been keeping members updated on Progress activities and events by email and individuals posts in relevant local groups. Until the tech issues are resolved, you can also find information on their website, here.

Angela Hoskings has also added information where relevant to her website, Coochiemudlo Island.

Keep an eye on the new Facebook Page, Coochie Markets, for details about upcoming markets (next markets are at Easter).

If you're a Rec Club member, note the following 👇

Gym fees are carried over from last year, but the annual membership ($5) is still required.

You can pay either by dropping the $5 (in an envelope) to Yvonne Symes, Treasurer, at 1 Kingfisher,

or deposit into:

Coochiemudlo Recreation Club

Bendigo Bank

BSB: 633-000

Account: 137959631

💥NEW💥Roles & Contacts for the Rec Club:

📣 Coochie Recreation Club – Who’s Who

As we head into an exciting new year at the Rec Club, here are your key points of contact for programs, activities, and gym coordination.

🏋️ Personal Training Co-ordinator
Helen Symes
📞 0412 340 227

💪 Gym Co-ordinator
Jacqui Sanders
📞 0488 664 666

🎨 Kids Activity Co-ordinator
Kate Barker
📞 0416 497 076

Whether you’re keen to get moving, organise activities for the kids, or have a question about the gym, these legends have you covered.

Redland City Council

Want to make a complaint? Report an issue?

Find out what week your bin goes out? Watch the latest Public Council Meeting? Do that here!

"How to Contact Redland City Council for

Various Community Issues"

Here is information on how Coochiemudlo residents can contact Redland City Council for various issues.

Individuals can report issues such as potholes, trees, roads, paths, rates, planning & development, and graffiti by phone, email, or submitting a contact form.

Residents can also give feedback, lodge complaints, or seek assistance from the council.

Report an Issue

Use this form to contact council

Redland City Council Public Meetings

Explore Redland City Council Meetings: Your Informative Archive for Public Viewing and Engagement.

Redland City Council Meeting Webcast offers an archive of past meetings for public viewing.

Have questions?

Visit the help page for assistance.

Did you know you can access recordings of General Meetings, Special Council Meetings, and Special Budget Meetings?

Stay informed about important decisions and discussions within the council.

Visit the Redland City Council Public Meetings archive here.

Disclaimer

The information in this newsletter is provided for general interest only. While every effort is made to ensure accuracy at the time of publication, details may change and unintentional errors can occur. Nothing here should be taken as professional, financial, legal, medical, or specialist advice. Always seek guidance from a qualified professional where needed.

Some content may be created, enhanced, or assisted by artificial intelligence. All AI-supported material is reviewed and edited by a human before publication. Any opinions expressed are those of the author and contributors and do not necessarily reflect the views of any featured organisations or individuals.

Event details, community updates, and offers are shared in good faith. Readers are encouraged to confirm information directly with the relevant organisers.

By reading this newsletter, you accept that the publisher is not responsible for any loss, inconvenience, or unexpected detours caused by reliance on the content.